My Husband Is Cheating And I’m Scared To Confront Him

I just found out that my husband is cheating and I’m scared, confused and unsure what to do now that I know. Are these the thoughts you have running through your head now that you have discovered that your husband has been having an affair? Unfortunately, you are not alone but there are some steps you can take to recover from his adulterous behavior.

My husband is cheating is something no woman really wants to have to deal with because there is so much pain involved. For many women they feel rejected, unworthy and unattractive once they find out that their husband has been unfaithful. They also feel trapped if their husband is the money-maker and provides the basic necessities of life e.g., food, clothing, shelter and other stuff.

Once you are convinced that your husband is cheating my thought is that you have to confront him about. There is no doubt in my mind that you will end up confronting him about it, whether you choose to do so or not. If you don’t interrupt his affair, I assure you that it will continue and at some point he will probably confront you with divorce papers.

My Husband Is Cheating – How To Confront Him

First I would recommend that you go through your evidence and re-assure yourself that what you have discovered is in-fact what you believe it is. You don’t have to be 100% sure but you don’t want to make false accusations that leads to a division between you based on a feeling you have. I just want you to be confident and not be easily persuaded that you are wrong. You also don’t want to tip your husband off and help him cover up his affair before you hash things out.

Next, I would suggest that you work out how you will confront your husband regarding his cheating. To do this, write down what you want to discuss with him and rehearse how you want the conversation to go. For example, do you want to talk about the most convincing evidence first and give him no chance to try to wiggle his way out of confessing? Perhaps, you are like some other women who say “if my husband is cheating I want him to come clean, without me making him do so”. In this case you would bring up the subject and see if he lies about it or humbles himself and admits to the cheating.

Once you figure out how you would like the conversation to take place, I would arrange a quite time where just you and your husband are present. I would not recommend having the discussion when kids or others are present because you never can predict how the discussion will go.

However, if your husband is abusive, physically or verbally and you are afraid, you might need to have this conversation with a close friend or relative nearby. Your safety must be taken into consideration, even though you are not the one who is cheating.

It’s important that you maintain control of your emotions during the conversation so make sure you are physically and emotionally ready to talk about it. Please remember that you have done nothing wrong here so don’t be fearful of bringing it up.

If you are ready to discuss the cheating by your husband then simply speak from your heart and let him know what you have found. Again, refer to the notes or journal you created where you documented your findings. Communicate this to him calmly and with conviction. Let the conversation play itself out and if you did your research properly a confession should be forthcoming.

My Husband Is Cheating and Confessed, Now What?

Please note that what you have done or are about to do is the start of a new life for you and your cheating husband. You have an opportunity before you to restore, rebuild and renew your marriage and relationship if you want to.

Dealing with a cheating spouse and learning how to forgive, love and trust again is not easy but it is possible. The key is making sure you both understand where you are and what it takes to get healing.

For some couples, marital counseling is an effective way to deal with infidelity. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work for all couples, especially if both persons aren’t ready to deal with the deep issues that surround the affair.

Source by D P Haynes

My Husband Says I Make Him Unhappy – Tips and Advice That May Help

I recently received correspondence from a wife who had been asking her husband for some time while he was acting as if he were so miserable. At first, he told her that he was just stressed at work. But when the work situation improved and the husband was still moping around, the wife continued to ask if there was anything she could do to help. The husband snapped that it was the wife and the marriage who was making him so unhappy.

Honestly the wife wasn’t completely caught off guard and shocked. She had been getting these vibes from her husband for some time, but she had hoped that this wasn’t the case. Of course, the wife tried to dig a little deeper and obtain more specifics, but all the husband would really do was to just repeat that the wife’s behavior and their crumbling marriage was making him pretty miserable.

The wife was understandably a little offended and angry. It wasn’t fair that the husband was blaming every problem in his life on her. She suspected that they both knew that even if they divorced or separated, all of the husband’s problems were not going to magically disappear just because he freed himself from his marriage and his wife. But once she began to calm down a bit, she had to admit that she did not want to end her marriage. She did love her husband and her family was very important to her.

She wanted to know how she should respond to this and if there was anything that she could do to make her husband happy again. It made her sad that he was so miserable and she felt a little guilty to think that her actions or behavior was responsible for this. I will tell you what I told her in the following article.

You’re Probably Right That Your Husband Is Wrong To Blame His Unhappiness And Misery On You And The Marriage, But His Perception Is His Reality: The wife was absolutely right that every problem in the husband’s life was not due to her. There’s no way that this could even be possible. And no, this was not fair. But, even though the husband’s perception was not rooted in reality, in his own mind, he was perfectly on target.

And the problem was that there was not any quick way to get the husband to change his mind. Sure, the wife could argue her points and debate with him until they were both of sick of hearing one another talk, but all this was likely to do was going to be to frustrate both of them. Worse, the husband was likely going to see the wife as someone who just didn’t understand him and didn’t really want for him to be happy.

Setting her husband up to see her as his adversary was probably only going to make matters worse. So, she was going to be better off accepting the fact that the husband’s problem and unhappiness was also hers. While she did not have to admit that any of this was her fault, she was going to be putting herself in a much better position if she attempted to sympathize with the husband and to convince him that she actually very much wanted for him to be happier.

Remembering The Things That Made You Both Happy And Brought You Closer: Husbands are sometimes not as perceptive as wives are. While you could probably pinpoint precisely what’s bothering you, men sometimes can not. So, when asked to define the source of their unhappiness, they will often point to the convenient culprit. This is often going to be the person closest to them. And unfortunately, this person is you.

This is often not a conscious thing that they’re doing. They don’t realize that they are projecting. But what they often aren’t verbalizing is that they are let down and disappointed in many areas of their life. I’d be willing to bet that the husband’s job was in fact bothering him. There were probably other things bothering him as well. But where he was most disappointed was that he perceived that his wife was no longer his rock or his shelter in the storm.

He very likely missed the closeness and unspoken understanding that they used to share. He likely missed the priority that he used to be in his wife’s life. Even the wife had to admit that since they had children, the both of them had less time for one another. And this was likely, at least somewhat, where the husband’s frustration and unhappiness lay.

I know this because I have many men who visit my blog and say as much. They feel selfish to resent the time spent with their children, or on their wife’s life, and on her obligations, but this is often part of the reality of the situation. Often, remembering the things that made you happy before life was so hectic and then became what it is now will help. Usually, if you attempt to make time for those little things, you will notice a difference in a lot of the unhappiness. Just seeing you make the time will often get his attention.

The Environment That Contributes To Happiness: Although I didn’t buy for a second that this wife was the sole source of the husband’s unhappiness, it never hurts to take stock and to see if anything in your own attitude or behavior is in any way contributing to the situation. People will mostly always respond positively to other people who make them feel good or better about their situations or about themselves. If you can make him feel competent, attractive, smart and funny, then you will likely have a very happy husband on your hands.

Yes, this sometimes requires for you to turn your attention to him when you are juggling far too many things, but sometimes even the smallest efforts can make the biggest difference. And you will often be regarded handsomely for this. You will often get back exactly what you give.

Source by Leslie Cane

I Think I Scared Him Off! What Your Next Step Should Be

“I think I scared him off!” Gosh, that’s never something you want to be saying about a man you actually like, is it? As much as you want to believe that he’s actually as busy as he says he is, your heart is telling you that he’s been absent because you came on too strong. What did you do? Did you talk about marriage before he even suggested dating exclusively? Maybe you told him that you loved him before he was ready to hear it? Whatever it was you did, the end result is what you really have to deal with now. He’s made himself scarce, you’re panicking and that planned future you had with him is all disappearing into the mist. You’ve got two choices in this situation. You can either succumb to defeat and just let him sneak out of your life forever or you can reinvent yourself in his eyes. The latter sounds so much better, doesn’t it? You may have messed up but you definitely have a chance to redeem yourself.

Scaring off a man is much easier than most of us realize. The beginning stages of a relationship look very different from a male and a female perspective. When we of the female persuasion meet a man we are fond of we tell him because honesty is always the best policy, right? It is, but to an extent. If you come on too strong before he’s ready to hear it, he’ll run for the door as fast as his feet will carry him. The same is true if you let it be known on the first, second or even third date that you’re the marrying kind and you imagine that the babies you’ll lovingly make with him will be adorable. He will panic and the easiest way for any man to deal with relationship panic is to flee.

Now that you’ve been enlightened as to why you may have scared him off it’s time to undo this dating error. First and foremost, give him some time. Bombarding him with calls, emails or text messages telling him how sorry you were won’t cut it. Your behavior will trump your words and all he’ll see is you trying harder than ever to get him to want you. You can’t allow this to happen.

Once a bit of time has passed, as in two or three weeks, call him up and keep it brief. If he doesn’t answer (and it’s very likely he won’t) leave a short message just saying that you wanted to see how he was, that you’ve been very busy and it would be great to catch up over a coffee at some point. The “at some point” part of this is crucial as it gives the impression that you’re not clambering to see him and that you’re not desperately trying to repair the already crumbling relationship.

Your message will probably be enough to intrigue him into calling you back. Again, no rushing to see him and no professing your desire to spend the rest of your days wrapped in his loving arms. Be calm and tell him that you’re busy through next week but you’d love to grab a coffee right after work in a couple of weeks. Don’t sound desperate and control your nervousness so you don’t sound too giddy to be hearing his voice. Then end the call and leave him alone until you meet.

By handling this delicate situation in this direct and non-threatening way you’re showing him that you’re not the lovesick fool who is running after him the way you used to. If you did indeed scare him off, your new, relaxed and uncommitted attitude will show him that he may have misread you initially. We all can change and showing the man you’re interested in that you’re not exactly who he thought you were may be the saving grace you’ve been searching for.

Source by Gillian Reynolds

Seduce Your Man: Seduction Tricks That Will Make Him Crazy About You

Has your relationship falling into a rut? Are things “fine” but you’re not satisfied with “fine”. You want passion, fire and desire in your relationship. You want him to be the first one to leave work and come sliding in the driveway sideways because he can’t stand to be apart from you for another minute.

Cultivating and building that desire, passion and romance isn’t as difficult as you might think. While you might not think of you as a seductress, you can plant that image in his mind and have him dreaming about you all day long. You can trick his mind into fantasizing about you and missing you every minute you’re apart.

Seduction is an ancient art that has fallen on hard times in recent years. With women taking on powerful roles in the workplace, it can be difficult for a girl to feel seductive. Having the power of a man and the seductive wiles of a woman can be the best of both worlds. Here are a few seduction tips that you can use to make any man desire you and think about you starting today.

Compliment Him – You might not think that men pay much attention to compliments but they do. He might shrug it off or appear not to care when you tell him that he looks handsome or if you point out how cute he looks when he smiles but inside he’s glowing. Most women don’t compliment men and this is a huge mistake. A man is attracted a particular woman more because of how he feels when he’s around her. If you compliment your man it is a sneaky way to make him feel good when he’s around you.

Get inside his mind and make him feel good being around you. Seduction of his mind, after all, will allow you to gain total control over the rest of his body. Tell him that you love his laugh or that his eyes are handsome or dreamy. Compliment him on his intelligence, sense of humor or any other attribute that you might find attractive about him. There’s a good chance that no other woman has ever complimented him other than his mother and these little compliments will make him feel connected to you. He will become addicted to your compliments.

Touch Him – Most men will never admit that they enjoy being touched but all of us need human contact to feel alive. By touching him you will create a physical bond with him. Take advantage of the opportunity to touch him any time he is close to you. This contact will cause him to desire more contact with you and this is a very sneaky way of seducing a man without him realizing that you’re actually doing anything.

Take a lesson from men who are experts at seducing women. Find an imaginary piece of lint on his shirt or an eyelash on his face and help him by removing it. Touch his shoulder or arm when he’s nearby or touch the small of his back. This is a very vulnerable area that is very close to his love handles, if he has any. Touching him on a regular basis very well might build the sexual tension to a point where he will seek you out just for you to touch him in the same way that a cat desires to be petted.

By focusing on his mind and his body in these two ways, by complimenting him and touching him, you’ll find that he is ripe for further seduction. Coming on too strong or throwing yourself at a man will simply turn him off. By laying the groundwork for true seduction, you’ll have a man that loves you and desires you with his mind and his body and he won’t know why.

Source by Cory Jean

My Spouse Feels That I Don’t Show Him Enough Affection So He’s Leaving Me

I think it’s fair to say that I hear from a lot of wives who are trying to deal with their husband recently leaving them. Some are surprised by this turn of events and some are not. Some are confused as to the reason that their husband has left and some have been given very specific reasoning. Some even get a note that fully outlines all of the perceived shortcomings that caused the husband to leave. One very common theme in these notes is not showing the husband enough affection or giving him enough attention.

A common scenario is one like: “I have felt like my husband was going to leave me for a long time. So I wasn’t surprised when he finally did. Our fights are usually centered on one main issue – he feels like he loves me more than I love him. He feels like I do not just naturally want to show him affection and he feels like he has to beg for my attention. I have really mixed feelings on this. On the one hand, I want to make my husband happy and content. On the other hand, I’m a bit resentful at this because it’s like he’s a child keeping score. We are both busy adults and yet he gives me the impression that I need to constantly see how he’s feeling and doing – almost like a pet. It almost feels as if he needs maintenance. Sometimes, I think that he is only going to be happy with a woman who is all over him and who can’t do enough for him. He wants someone who is just going to constantly go out of her way to tell him how great he is. The great irony of this is that I do think that he is great. I love him. But I don’t feel the need to act as if we are teenagers who constantly have to fawn all over one another to prove our love. To me, this smacks of desperation and immaturity and it’s hard for me to respect it. I feel like he’s so needy that he’s a well that can never be filled and that is exhausting. At the same time, I love him and I don’t want to end our marriage. But how can we find the common ground where he feels he gets enough affection and I don’t feel that I’m having to work so hard all of the time while never making him happy?”

This Is A Common Situation That Can Be Fixed: This situation is very common when you have two different personalities. You sometimes find couples where one of them is very demonstrative and has no problem showing affection. Often, this spouse also likes a lot of affection and feels very comfortable both giving it and receiving it. And on you can have the other spouse on the other end of the spectrum – they typically know that their loves and appreciates them without being reminded of it all of the time. When these two get married, the demonstrative spouse can feel like he’s not getting enough while the more reserved spouse can feel as if no mater how much affection they give, it can never be enough.

If this conflict isn’t addressed and properly worked through, it can escalate to the point where one spouse feels that it will never be rectified, and as a result, might leave. I don’t believe for one second that this means that the couple can’t resolve the issue and eventually be more compatible. The key is to talk very openly and honestly about expectations and compromises.

Get Very Specific In Order To Find A Compromise: When the husband says he doesn’t feel that she “shows enough affection,” that is an extremely broad statement. Does he mean that they are not having enough sex? Does he mean that she doesn’t hug him, hold his hand, or give him verbal affirmation enough? Does it mean that he just doesn’t feel loved in general? Does it mean that he needs for her to show more appreciation for the things that she does? Showing affection means different things to different people. As silly as it might sound, sometimes you have to get very specific with this. You need to break it down to figure out what, exactly is meant and what exactly, is making him so unhappy.

Because the wife could already be attempting to do what she thinks is affectionate, be way off the mark, and still have a husband who doesn’t feel loved. So the result is that he feels unsatisfied and she feels that no matter what she does or how often she does it, then it’s never going to be enough. That’s why it really helps to break it down. Having a counselor to facilitate this can be quite helpful, but I know that not all husbands will agree to this.

If not, then I’d suggest giving it a couple of days and then reaching out. You might try something like: “needless to say, I’m very upset that you left. But I’m not surprised. This is an issue that has been troubling our marriage for a very long time. I want to solve this issue too. I believe that if we work together and in the right way, we can fix this. But living apart is all but assuring that we can’t fix it. Because I’m not sure how I can give you more affection when you’re not even here. If you were trying to get my attention, you did and I want to make this right. But I’m not sure that you’re leaving is going to do it. Would you be willing to see someone to help us to determine how to give us both what we want? If not, then we need to sit down and get very specific on what we both need and can comfortably give.”

It’s very difficult to predict how the husband might respond. He may be willing to get very detailed about what he needs without much intervention or it may take a little effort to pull it out of him. At the same time, once you determine what he needs, then you’ll want to also define what you can comfortably and genuinely give without feeling as if you are filling something without a bottom. There is usually a compromise here somewhere. You just have to find it.

Source by Leslie Cane

How to Get a Guy Interested After You Have Chased Him Too Much? This Is the Trick You Need

If you have realized your mistake in chasing him too much and getting him irritated with your behavior, then stop and change your tactics immediately. Here are some tips that will help you to interest him and attract him to you despite your earlier mistakes.

Stop your chasing and concentrate on becoming irresistible

Stop chasing him and make sure he notices that you are not coming on to him that strongly! Instead channel all your energies into becoming the most attractive and irresistible female around. If you are successful in changing your image you will have a lot of males interested in you and that will make him attracted to you.

Ignore him completely

The best thing for you to do is to ignore him completely. He is bound to notice this complete reversal of feelings on your part and he will be curious to know the reasons for your cold and distant behavior. Even if he does not admit it and seemed angry at your relentless chasing, his ego was boosted because of your attention. Now he will begin to miss you and will start to get interested in you.

Fascinate him

Don’t let him get used to you in any particular way. Be different and alluring every time you are in contact with him. Just when he begins to think he knows you very well – change your tactics and make him feel that he does not know you at all! This will make him wonder why he thought you chased him too much in the first place!

Distract and tempt him

Once you have stopped chasing him and showing him how much you like him, it is important to grab his attention by wearing clothes that make you look gorgeous and act in a manner that puts you above the rest. The trick is not to show him that you know he is watching you. This behavior will confuse him and he will be distracted and tempted to know you better.

Start proving your worth

If you think that he is making a big mistake by not getting “caught”, it is up to you to prove it! Make him regret the fact that he did not take you up on your offer! Let him see that you are definitely worth having and he will start to chase you instead.

Get your timing right

If you have realized your mistake in chasing him too much, then back off for a while. Wait and bide your time till you are sure that he is beginning to notice that you are not so bad after all. Gain his confidence and trust and be friendly without being too pushy. Get your timing right and then set out to charm and interest him all over again.

Become a mystery to him

If a guy thinks he knows all about you – prove him wrong and become elusive and enigmatic and he will automatically be interested in you. He won’t be able to resist a woman with an air of mystery around her. Make him curious about you and he will fall for it.

Source by Krista Hiles

How to Tell a Guy Friend That You Like Him Without Ruining the Friendship! Do it This Way

Falling for a guy friend romantically is something that happens more of than not. It can either be deliriously exciting or a nightmare. Believe me, because I do know how it feels. When you have been very good friends with each for a long time and then suddenly, just like that, you realize you are always thinking of him, feeling uncomfortable and acting weird when he’s around, you’ll know that things have changed.

So what happened and what changed? Your feelings, you stupid! You are falling in love with the guy and you don’t know what to do. More than anything, you are scared that he will not return your feelings. Things will not be easy for you my friend. Act sensibly and with luck you will find that he feels the same way about you.

Don’t however, depend on luck alone, if your guy friend has always treated you like another of his casual friends and has absolutely no idea how you feel; you’re in for a tough time. You can either let him know straight away and risk your friendship or worse still, he’ll be aghast since he had no idea and thinks of you as a sister. Ugh! Now that can be really painful. So here’s what you do. Take it easy and don’t rush your fences or you will spoil the whole plan. These are my tactics and they have worked for me. Others might have different ways of doing it.

• Never tell your guy friend right away that you have feelings for him because if he does not think of you like that, it’ll be a shock for him and he might start avoiding you. Once you have burnt your boat there’s nothing you can do.

• Be a true friend to him. Listen when he talks; even if it’s about other girls. Laugh with him when he’s happy and show your concern when he’s having problems.

• Be the first to offer help when he needs it. Show how concerned you are and let him know that you will stand by him no matter what.

• Look attractive whenever you are with him. Let him see you in a different light; as a desirable woman and not as a member of the gang.

• Surprise him with intelligent conversation and be knowledgeable about his interests in life (even if it’s boring).

• Be ready to accompany him to a soccer match or motor show even if you’d rather be at a movie, alone with him. Never nag him.

• In short, be indispensable to him.

• When you have him eating out of your hand, start acting elusive and mysterious. If you have been calling him, don’t call; wait for him to call you. When he wants you to go somewhere with him, say that you have a previous appointment, but don’t tell with whom. Let him wonder.

When you arrive at this stage, he will definitely feel your absence and worry that he has been taking you for granted. He will start wondering whether you have found a boyfriend or are slowly moving away from him. That will scare him to hell and make him come running to you to tell you that he can’t do without you. Believe me, it works, every time.

Source by Krista Hiles

How to Make Him Hungry for You? Do These 7 Things & Make Him Run After You All the Time

The forbidden fruit always seems sweeter. You can use this law of nature to make your man so hungry for you that he begins to worship the ground you walk on. Here are some ways how you can do this effortlessly.

Appear delicious
It goes without saying that if you want your man to crave for you endlessly then you have to be very appealing visually. You need the perfect body, skin, hair and more importantly attitude. When you walk around him, his jaws should drop. So, get that fabulous shape and get your skin, hair and face taken care of by a professional.

Appear sporadically
You have to make sure that you give him a glimpse of yourself only once in a while. Make the disappearing act a habit till you have achieved your goal. He needs to see you in bits and spurts. The more you do this the hungrier he gets.

Sex appeal
Now that you have taken care of your body and other assets, it is time that you tickle his imagination. Dress sexily and show your cleavage and long legs. However, do so in a subtle manner. You should strut around him in such a manner that his heart skips a beat whenever you are near him.

Along with a great body you will also need a sharp and intelligent mind to capture his imagination. Brush up on your general knowledge and become aware of the issues that are important to one and all around you.

So close yet so far
When you maintain approachable distance he is lured into your maze. He should get the impression that you are approachable yet distant. Never get so close to him that he begins to take your presence for granted. Always maintain the balance of power in your favor.

Acknowledge his other qualities
Your guy will make sure that he looks and smells good. He will also ensure that he puts on his best behavior whenever you are around. Instead of acknowledging his looks or sense of dressing compliment him on his other fine qualities like his conversation skills or his intellectual faculty.

Positive and happy vibes
The vibes that you give out are as important as all the above efforts. He should know that you are a happy person and have a positive outlook towards life. Once you present this complete package his hunger for you will be insatiable.

Source by Krista Hiles

My Husband Has Moved Out – How To Get Him Back In The Shortest Time

He packed his things and left the house. “My husband has moved out, what should I do?” I know this can be quite a devastating and confusing situation to be in. Things seem to look dire and you probably will start asking if it is still possible to get your husband back.

When you are trying to get back a husband who has moved out, the first thing that you should do is to get your emotions under control and be calm. You have to know for the fact that your husband moved out could be because he really needs a break to be away from you. He is probably trying to sort out the problems and work on it or maybe even considering a divorce. Whatever the reason that it is going to be, one thing for sure, he needs time to cool down too.

Since your husband moved out because he needs some space and time, don’t push him away by bugging him for a chance to re work on the marriage. Sometimes, the feeling of missing him can get so strong that it makes you want to contact him. No matter how, even if you feel miserable for not having him sleeping by your side, talking to you every day, you can’t just get aggressive to win him back. If you are going to question him endlessly, he may get irritated and will start to think that it is better to divorce in order to get the peace and space he wants.

You definitely need to strategize your plan properly so that you can get him back in the shortest time. Learn to accept the fact that there are really problems in your marriage and the only way to get him back to your side again is to change for the better. It is a process of transforming! So when you are ready to get in touch with him, he has to see the best on what is in you.

You have to make your husband feel comfortable as much as possible so do not start talking about what should be done to the marriage when you meet him. Never be too anxious to show you want him back, just be very normal and casual on the topic. Once your husband sees the changes in you, it will come off making him more interested to know what kind of life you have been through during the period without his presence.

Once you are able to let loose a little bit on your husband, you will stop trying all means to save the marriage. This will save you from embarrassing and desperate actions that could just drive him further away.

Even though right now your husband has moved out, there are many ways to get him back in the shortest of time.

Source by Anastacia Huang

How to Get Him to Define the Relationship Without Scaring Him Away

You meet a guy, you click with him, you have this undeniable chemistry and all your friends say that you look good together. The only problem is that you are clueless where you stand in his life or if you are supposed to expect something more. Unfortunately, we live in a society where “double standards” is a way of life. Women are not supposed to make the first move and that’s how manipulation comes into play. No matter what your reasons are, you should never manipulate a man to commit to you especially if you are thinking about having a healthy, loving relationship.

There are ways on how to get him to define the relationship and the best way is to be straightforward about it. I know we’ve been told not to initiate “the talk” but if you are the kind of woman who hates investing on a relationship that’s not going anywhere, your best bet is to ask the guy where he thinks the relationship is going. Tell him that you are not the type to make assumptions and you want to know what he wants from you. It’s a very straightforward question that requires a direct answer. Ask him if he just wants to be friends or if he’s looking forward to something more. Don’t worry about scaring him away, if anything, he will appreciate your honesty. If he is not serious about you and he only wants you to stick around so he’ll have someone to sleep with, he is not going to be thrilled to answer your questions. A few words would come out of his mouth and will try to change the subject immediately. You’ll be glad you asked for your sake. At least you know what’s really going on. This is your cue to reconsider your options. You have to decide whether you’re willing to take a gamble or move on and keep looking.

If a guy comes clean with a candid answer and tells you “I’m having so much fun with you but I don’t think I can be in a serious relationship right now. I don’t want to disappoint you or anything.” then maybe it’s time for you to get out but do it with grace and tell him you understand, no hard feelings. Thank him for his honesty and politely ask him not to text or call you anymore. 9 out of 10 guys will have a change of heart and the biggest mistake that women make is that they call the guy a couple of days later and tell him that they’re willing to be casual. There goes your dignity and self-respect out of the window.

If you don’t have the courage to ask him or if it’s too early on in the relationship, there is a more subtle approach on how to get him to define the relationship. Practice self-control and resist the urge to give the guy all the freebies. As demeaning as the expression “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” is, it holds some truth to it and whether we like it or not, it applies to most relationships especially if you and the guy are not on the same page. Sure, you are having sex regularly but it should never be used as a gauge how serious the relationship is. Just because he sleeps with you doesn’t mean that he is going to give you a title. Never assume that you are someone’s girlfriend unless you’ve had that conversation. It doesn’t matter if he brings you flowers or if he takes yoga classes with you, you have to verbally agree that you two are exclusive but until then, you can’t tell people that he is your boyfriend.

Source by Jennie Anne