If you have caught yourself doing any of these 10 things on a date or in the beginning of a relationship and the man disappeared or broke up with you, it may be time to make some changes.
1. Talk about your ex-boyfriend. Men really don’t want to hear about the men that were before them. It also is a good sign that you aren’t over your ex. He also may feel that you are comparing him to your ex. Men want to be accepted, not compared.
2. Share too many feelings. Men don’t really like to talk about feelings. They will talk about feelings, but only when they feel like it. If you want to talk about your feelings, call a girlfriend. Feelings talks will scare him off.
3. Buy Him a Gift. If you buy him a gift, especially if he hasn’t bought you one, it puts pressure on a man big time. He assumes that you may expect gifts as well. He may not be ready to be gifting you just yet. It also tells him you invested effort. That’s all fine and well if he is investing effort, but to do this just because you felt like it makes him feel you may role into that cycle of resentment. In other words, you give gifts, he doesn’t, and you start to resent doing this for him even though he never asked you too. Happens all the time.
4. Talk about the men that want to date you. Don’t do this. It’s just tacky. If you are wanted by other men, he will pick up on it without you telling him about it. He will see this as you trying to make him jealous and he will disappear and find a woman doesn’t do this.
5. Do his laundry or other household chore. Ugh, if he wanted a mother, he would go back home. Men don’t want to have sex with their mother. This is a sure fire way to kill his attraction for you if you do this prior to a serious commitment. If you are always helping men, this may be what scared him off.
6. Share personal details of you life with him. Later when you relationship is established and he knows you better, this may be okay. In the beginning though, he has no frame of reference about you and he may very well make generalized assumptions based on his experiences. Sharing your life history too soon will can scare him off.
7. Initiate texts and phone calls. This is his first sign that you may not be able to trust him. If you can’t wait for him to call or text, you are trying to control the outcome. The result, he sees you as controlling and he runs for the hills.
8. Cook an elaborate dinner. Save the nice dinners for after the commitment. If you do this too soon, he sees you are trying to impress him. He really should be trying to impress you at this point, not the other way around. A woman that tries too hard is often seen as desperate. Desperate women scare men off.
9. Show up as his house or place of work unannounced. Double ugh. This he may associate with stalking, not to mention the bad memories in brings to mind about the last girl that would not take no for an answer. This will get you the crazy chick label and scare him off faster than anything.
10. Ask him where the relationship is headed. Women often ask this early on or they ask him how he feels about them or does he like you. This shows him you aren’t secure and that you are depending on him for validation. He starts to feel responsible for your happiness. Let him take this responsibility on his own, don’t force his hand. You may not like the cards he shows you.
If you have been doing any of the above things on dates or in the first few weeks or months of dating, this is why he disappeared.